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Friday, February 21, 2014

The one who was always left



They leave.

They always do.

Whether they'd leave tomorrow or the next day, they leave. No one cares enough about me more than I do. Heck, I sometimes want to leave myself if I could. I always roam around life, with a lot of masks, a lot of faces. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I don't even recognise myself. They all say I'm afraid of commitment. But I'm really not.

I'm just afraid of being left behind.

Sometimes they have a reason why they do it. They make up stories how we could never work out, or that they found someone else. They's be sweaty and fidgety when they tell me, trying to tell me that they had a great time. They'd try to make me feel better, telling me how beautiful my hair is, or how smart I am.

The worst are those who don't explain. Everything is happy one day, and then suddenly they don't have the balls to tell you it's over. You just stare at your phone whole day, wishing it would come alive all of the sudden. You throw your phone across the room when it's a spam text, or you don't answer your mother's calls because he might call.

But in the end you know, all of them will leave.

Until he came along.

At first I never wanted to believe he existed. But the more I pushed him away, the more he wanted to be with me. He made me believe in fairytales, the once I puked over when I was a little kid. There was something different about him, they way he said my name, they way he held my hand, the way he kissed me. I found myself getting annoyed of his texts, and he texted me all the time.

"Karen."

He'd text.

"I'm outside your window. Open up."

But I don't. I don't let anyone in anymore.

He'd just wait outside my window, sometimes all through the night. Then I'd hear him talking to his mom, making him go home. He'd always leave a rose on the window sill, and it always smells better in the morning.

But one day, the roses stopped.

The texts stopped.

And when I was yearning for him for some reason, I found myself sitting in front of a gravestone.

Left alone, once again.

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Fiction, originally written by yours truly.

26 comments:

  1. Another amazing story. I love how you make me feel like I am right there in the middle of the story!

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  2. Oh my gosh... you just gave me a chill. How sad. When you look at it that way, you are right, they all leave. One day, we will leave all our loved ones behind too.

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  3. Once again i enjoyed reading i always enjoy coming to your blog to found the next post you have written.

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  4. I think we all go through a period of time when we feel so alone. I love this. Very nicely written.

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  5. Oh, this is a sad one :( I think all of us have experienced this at one time or another. No fun :(

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  6. How sad is that! I love reading all of your fiction. You are very talented.

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  7. This is a great piece! Very moving, and it makes you think in-depth too.

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  8. Oh my, that was heartbreaking. But I still want to know what happens next.

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  9. As if they took the words right out of my mouth. I love reading things and finding people who can write and put into words what I feel. I'm in a odd place right now with being sick my family hasn't left or anything but I feel like friends have given me space so I can heal and it gets' lonely so I know the feeling well of what is written here you are a great writer.

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  10. wow i love this it really got to me. you're a brilliant writer.

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  11. Aww, so very sad. But nice work writing - I like reading your stories.

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  12. It's so sad when those whom you depend upon suddenly let you down...

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  13. Beautifully written. You absolutely have a way with words to touch people!

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  14. Such a sad story! I'm so sorry. Is this from personal experience?

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  15. How incredibly sad was that ending?! That broke my heart, for both characters :(

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  16. How incredibly sad was that ending?! That broke my heart, for both characters :(

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  17. "I'm just afraid of being left behind." Fear can be disabling and sometimes the very thing that causes what you are afraid of. If you are fearful enough of it happening, that emotion alone will make it happen.

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  18. That's a sad ending. The character in the end seemed to be so kind hearted. :)

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  19. What a great story! Karen seems a little confused. She pushes him away and then wonder why she's alone.

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  20. Poignant... and sad. It made me think of the times I walked away and found the same way you did what happened the other other person.

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  21. I can relate to Karen, very much. I want to be alone, but then I dont want to be alone. I have moments when I yearn to have someone close but once they are close I want them to leave. Its a crazy life.

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  22. I love how you manage to always capture the essence of your characters so well. Also, I know I haven't said this yet, but I LOVE your blog layout. Very nice :)

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  23. Very sad but a great story! Broke my heart!

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  24. I can totally relate to this character. I actually used to get anxiety attacks thinking about being alone eventually. The ending feels like it was literally about me & I remember my first love passing away in high school. So touching & real, you really draw the reader into the story.

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  25. You tell the best stories! I think a lot of people can relate to Karen!

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  26. Why did he stop leaving? Did he give up? Did he die?? Your story leaves me wanting more, which is a great thing.

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